Yes, I had to ask.
We have these lives that ask us to go to school…finish school…get good grades…go to college or trade school…get good grades (theme here!!)…finish school…get a job….work hard at that job…pay the bills…get more things…pay more bills…take care of our family’s…have kids…pay more bills…get the kids involved…run those kids around…put the kids in the best schools…pay more bills…get stressed so you take a vacation…pay more bills…work even harder because of the bills and time off….get more stuff…
You get the idea. You may even be living some of this! There’s nothing wrong with the school, or the family, or the bills, or any of the above! It’s a blessing to work and to achieve. But it can take over our lives and we forget why we even started in the first place!
A few years ago, my brand new husband and I pulled back from a very lucritive lifestyle. We worked our tails off to get there. At the height of our careers…we left. (I wish I could put a huge pause here!!) Yes we left. I personally had finally arrived and I loved my job. I was starting to make a large sum of money even…and I left. We didn’t just leave in a small way (if you know my husband and I, we don’t do many things in a small way!!), we left our jobs, our lifestyle, our income, our state and retreated up into Northern Michigan. From the city and shopping and going out to eat and lunch dates and music on the ‘veranda’ to a small farm in a small town.
My Father was terminally ill. That was one reason. But I believe that my Fathers illness was a catalyst. We were able to have 6 months with my loving Dad who was my mentor and friend…He passed away 2 1/2 years ago and I’m still here in remote Northern Michigan.
We felt God leading us to pull back–we needed a retreat. Both my husband and I had rough divorces that dragged us through the mud. In all honesty, I felt like I had gone to Hell and back. Seven years of drama and turmoil that didn’t seem to let up until I met Jim. I was exhausted. Loved where God had brought me–New loving husband, Fianlly the side of “town” I always wanted to live in, and a fantastic career–but…exhausted just the same.
The truth…I needed more than a vacation. I needed a respite. To pull back. To think. To regroup. To hear and to LISTEN from God. God wanted something more for me and my family, but I wasn’t going to be able to have that if I stayed where I was. I loved it too much! I was able to buy things…and coming from my single-motherhood state, THAT meant something to me!! I did it! I had arrived! Look at me…I accomplished the goal! Wait…did you hear it?
I, me, my, I loved…I did…
Don’t get me wrong, I leaned heavily on my Savior through all those tough times and years. He lead me to the point where I was, even with all my mistakes! Only, when I arrived, I loved it and was very proud of myself for gettting there!! I would have been quite happy staying there! But, God wanted more. He wanted to bless me and my family (and my new marriage) in a way that I couldn’t even imagine at the time, but I was having such a hard time stepping out of the way. I had gone through some pretty rough times…some of you can’t imagine the turmoil! But now…Now, I was on my feet! And I no longer had to beg anyone…ANYONE for food, or clothes, or gas for my car, or a job.
Under my new husbands love for me, he said, “Let’s go!” So, we did. It has been a struggle. My Dad passed away. Jobs up here are scarce. Money is even scarcer (is that a word??). The winters…geesh! They are long. We are in a small town and can hardly find a Starbucks!! What is that?!?! I mean, we have chickens in our barn!! Hahaha… it’s just the life I’ve needed. Time to think and re-evealuate. Time to become one with that wonderful new husband of mine! Man, we’ve been through it. In the last three years, we’ve had a lifetime together!!
So, now it’s time. Time to step out again. This time trusting God and His leading. Holding my husbands hand and moving forward with the dream that God has given me. Lifting and encouraging others, because now that I’ve healed a bit (oh yes, I still have scares!), I can smile and point others to the True Source of strength…Jesus Christ. All that I am (at least the parts that you may like) are from him! (Keep in mind, I may have parts that you don’t like…they are still me trying to exert myself! Sorry about that!! I’m a work in progress!!) We (which is a much different term than I was using before my respite)…WE are moving forward, being lead by Who…not what…not Self..
And ya know what’s so great about all this?? I really don’t know what’s going to happen next!! It’s a complete adventure full of surprises!! Who could ask for anything more?
- Gorgeous, loving husband who fully supports me
- Beautiful children who I respect and they respect me
- Adventure in my life that I can relax with (not that I always do…)
- Success beyond what I dreamed of (This doesn’t necessarily mean money yet…)
Yup…I’m living the dream life (Which means most days I’m content to be lead!) and it’s getting better and better!! Who knew it could be this simple? …God did! And He has much much more in store. His provision, His timing, His plan…god has it all worked out. I have to trust in that plan and do the steps that He has placed before me. That’s what it means to “Walk by Faith”
So…Who is leading you?