Tag Archives: forgiveness

You Hurt me!! And You Want Me to Forgive you??

Forgiveness is Fitness!Here at Red Fox, we believe in 5 areas of fitness and we take them seriously.

Spiritual, Relational, Physical, Nutritional, & Mental

The High 5 starts with Spirituality…

This comes first for a reason.  We were created with an area inside of us that is quenched best by connecting to something much greater than us.  I believe in Jesus Christ.  He is my Lord and Saviour.  In fact, I’m not sure how to separate myself from this relationship that I have.  I was once asked to deny my faith in Jesus by a man who I adored.  He asked me to give it all up.  To him it was an intellectual thing and I could just let it go.  This man was from Ireland.  I thought about how to explain it the way he could understand.  I asked him if he could ever just stop being Irish and from Ireland…. It is in and throughout who he is.  So is my walk with God.  It’s not a religion.  Or Church.  Or a building that I attend on Sundays.  It is the lifeblood of who


I am.  My heart seeks after God.  I am not perfect nor have I arrived (nor will I ever arrive).  I continually mess up.  I sin (I once heard an explanation of sin as “Missing the Mark” from Steven Furdick @ Elevation Church. Beautifully put!).  We ALL do this “Missing the Mark” daily!!  We get tired, grumpy, walked on, forgotten and hurt.  Sometimes we are the one hurting others.  We do this without thinking sometimes and…we do it on purpose at other times!! We let our emotions just simply get the best of us!  I do it…you do it… it happens.  Personally, I know how awful I feel when I let my tongue go off like a race horse!! I’ve said and done some awful things!  Later…I regret most of it!

Winston Churchill Success is not final…

God…looks at our hearts.  He knows we get tired.  He knows we get worried and scared.  He knows we get hungry.  He knows even better than we do how our emotions can get the best of us!  I’m a Mom.  I have four children of my own and two step daughters.  When my kid were (are) younger, there are things that they do that I can excuse.  They break something by bumping it.  They don’t have total control over their bodies and move around way too quickly.  Oops.  Something I really liked gets caught up in their learning how to control themselves.  I can excuse it, because I know that they are still learning.  They didn’t mean to do it!  I, as their mother know their heart!  God sees us the same way.  He knows our maturity and ability to handle the situation.  He knows that we aren’t “all grown up yet” and can excuse us and forgive us and love us through our messes.

Now, just because I understand doesn’t mean that I look the other way.  There is still a lesson in the broken pieces.  What my child did was still wrong and needs to be addressed.  They need to help clean up the mess and apologize for their mistake.  I will smile and love on my child letting them know all is well AFTER they apologize and ask for forgiveness.  Just the same, we need to address what it is that we’ve done and ask for forgiveness from those we’ve stepped on or hurt.  It’s hard…but necessary not only for them, but for ourselves.  We need reconciliation in our relationships and in our walk with God himself!  Our Heart needs to feel at peace and one with Our True Source of strength!

It’s a rare moment when you come across someone who does this.  However, when we have been wronged, we are to be at the ready to forgive.  This process needs to happen long before it’s asked.  For me, it’s all about looking into the mirror.  I do the same dumb things that others do to me so how can I accuse them of being so awful when I go and do it too!!!???  It gives me the ability many times to understand the one who wronged me!

Red Fox Fitness Tulip…from our backyard!

A year or so back, I had someone tear me apart from limb-to-limb verbally.  This guy cussed and swore and called me some bitter names.  Had we been face-to-face I’m not so sure it wouldn’t have gone to blows.  It was bad!  He was doing some service work for me and didn’t do what I asked.  When I questioned him about it, he lost control of his tongue completely!!  Clearly, the venom coming out of his mouth was from way more than me questioning him.  However, I was in tears and angry and hurt all at the same time.  My husband stepped in the conversation taking the phone from me (because no one talks to his wife that way…period!! Good man!!), and the venom continued at him!! Needless to say, we had nothing good to say about that business.  I even avoided driving down that street for a long time so I wouldn’t have to be reminded of “That Man!”

It is finished! For more than what Jesus did on the cross! Allow Mistakes and hurts to be finished too! Yours and theirs!

This past Sunday I was in church like usual and a man come up to me with tears in his eyes asking me to forgive him.  All I could say was for what?  I didn’t know this man and I didn’t remember anyone wronging me.  As he explained who he was, I knew.  All I could think about doing was giving this poor man a hug letting him know it was all ok…especially now that he addressed it!  Water under the bridge!! It takes an honest and humble person to admit when they are wrong.  Clearly, he wanted to attend church (he was new there!) without having to think about what all happened over a year ago!  Chalk it up to a bad day, being way too hungry, stresses of life…whatever.  “We have all sinned and fallen short!”  Last time I checked…all…means all!

That reminds me…I have amends to make from my past as well!  Be sure to forgive and to ask for forgiveness…just see how much love is poored out within you.  Let go of those hurts…they are not worth holding onto.  They hold you back from following your heart and block the goodness from flowing through you!

With love,


Red Fox Fitness Pamela DeVrou Smith

Forgive and Forget!

I’ve been wondering….Who’s hurt you?  Who has done something that is down-right wrong?  Crossed your path?  Made you mad?  Who is it that has been sinful in your life?  Who did the unthinkable?  Has someone talked about you?  Called you a name?  Gossiped about you or someone close to you?  Has someone in authority committed the “unforgivable sin”?  And to think…they even call themselves a Christian!!

Has the offense been recent?  Or a long time ago?  Do you remember when you cared about that person and now…well, the hurt is just to great?

I’m sorry.  No, I really am.  That person may have been me.  I carry doubts.  I carry fears.  Rejection.  Hurts.  Memories.  Pain.  Sin.  I’ve hurt others so badly that they have stopped talking to me.  Told others about the wrong that I’ve done and yet won’t speak to me about it so I don’t know what I did!!  I’ve done this more than once!  Unfortunately, I’m afraid I will do it again within my lifetime.  Sigh.  I’m sorry.  And…I claim to be a Christian too!  Go figure!  I mess up.  I get tired.  I get cranky.  I get hungry.  I say stupid things.  I judge others way too harshly.  I’m sorry.  I really am.  Please forgive me… Jesus does.

The guy that was hanging on the cross right next to Jesus who committed some really awful awful sins…He asked Jesus to forgive him and He did.  He said to him….”Today you will be with me in paradise!”  Wow!!

It’s hard to let go of what people say sometimes or what they do.  They can really REALLY hurt us!  Sometimes what they do affects us so much because of past hurts that we have and so, it’s compounded!

I don’t want to take long with this one…I just want to reflect for a moment.  I know I personally do hurt others (or even myself!!) and I don’t let go of hurts that others have committed against me!  Have you ever done this?  Are you doing this right now?

I just keep asking myself:  Who am I to think I know better than God Himself?  I mean, if he can forgive me…then why shouldn’t I forgive others?  Dig deep on this one…be still…ask God what he would have you do and you will find the answer.  We don’t have to like everyone…but we do have to love others.  We don’t have to chum with them or be friends…but we are to forgive and allow healing from sin to take place.  Healing not only for them…but for us.  Sin clogs up all the beauty that God is trying to work into our lives!! It stops us from moving forward…

I don’t want that for you…or for me.  Open up those doors of unforgiveness and allow God to clean up that area in our lives.  Let’s live with clean Spirits like we are striving so much to do with our clean eating and our fitness!!  Just be still…and listen for the answer on this one.  This is just as much for me as you…thought you should know!


With love… ~Pamela

From My Personal Journal

Last spring, 2011 I heard a song from Sarah Bareilles “Let The Rain”:


“I wanna Let the Rain…come down-make a brand new ground.  Let the rain…come down….on me.”  God chose these words to speak to me and I wrote them down…


“Rain…I don’t like it.  It drowns out the sun.  Everything seems so dreary.  So what’s the point?

Rain is good for the ground.  It feeds, nourishes, cleanses, refreshes.  The moisture makes everything all around it supple.  It quenches, rejuvenated and replenishes.  Rain is needed.  We can’t survive without it!

Same Coin…two sides!

The cleansing is what I need most right now.  I’ve been under a dark cloud for so long.  I’ve needed to grieve from all I’ve been through.  Grieve for healing.  Grieve for forgiveness.  Grieve for growth.  I’ve learned so much from all I’ve been through–it’s time to say goodbye to the hurts.  Time to forgive: to forgive those that have hurt me, to forgive myself for allowing so much pain to enter into my life, to forgive myself for staying in that pain and drama for so long.

From this goodbye comes the hello to all that I am now.  I’ve come a long way.  It’s time to bring forth the fruit that God wants to grow?  The “plant” is ready to produce.”

The vision that I wrote down in this journal entry was this:

Stepping out into the Light Takes courage and Trust!

“The bags are packed.  The apartment is empty.  My jacket is on & my purse is in hand…I look back from the door, sigh, say goodbye and step out into the sun!”

It’s time to shine forth and bring God’s light.  Touch lives.  Time to be the conduit of God’s energy to tap into.  It’s time.  Forgive & let go of all that’s past.  Take with me all that I’ve learned & share the hope with others!!


The message to me is the same message that is to you…


It’s time to step out into the light &b be the leader you were created to be.

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”  Phil 4:8  This verse has been my verse throughout my adult life.  With all that I lack, I have Christ.  I relate with Moses when he says to God…”but who am I Lord, that you should send me?”  lol…  That’s how I have felt in so many things in my life.  What I lacked, God made it possible for me to understand anyway.

I’ve been through some really tough times.  At the time, I couldn’t understand why.  Why did I need to have it so rough?  I didn’t understand and those around me couldn’t hardly comprehend it…but God knew.  He had a plan.  God would take all the sin and ugly and hurts in my life and turn them into something beautiful for me.  Something that He could use to help others.  From being adopted, to getting married young and having kids young, to getting an incredibly ugly divorce, to having so much and losing it all, to single motherhood..you name it.  God has uniquely put together a beautiful gold thread throughout my life and has made it strong.

God’s got me and my life…and He’s got you!

Going through hurt.  I wept. I rocked at night…praying and grieving and wringing my hands with worry.  I was in pain.  Pain that no one could take away and yet…now…it’s beautiful!!  I wouldn’t trade the “rain” in my life for anything.  I wouldn’t want to go through it again!!  However, I can say at this point in my life that if more comes my way…I can trust that everything will be ok.  God’s got this in my life…and in yours as well!  If you are going through “the rain”, remember, in the end it can be a beautiful gold thread that can shine a Light for others to follow.